1 Year Anniversary

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Hello! 🙂

I cannot believe that it has been one year since I started this blog!!!!!

I was so nervous to put my stories and thoughts out into the world, but looking back, I am so happy and grateful that I stirred up the courage to create this personal space where people from around the world can journey through this rollercoaster called life with me.

So today I thought I would update my “bio”.  I happened to read my first blog post and noticed that a lot has changed since then.

I am now 20 years young and I am no longer pursuing a degree in psychology.  I have also taken a gap year from college and have permanently left, what I thought at the time, my “dream school.” I am planning on continuing my education through a junior college next spring to finish my GE and then work towards getting my teaching credential that specializes in Special Needs Education.

I have recognized that I have a very big heart for these individuals.  I have worked with Special Needs Children for the past year and a half and I absolutely love it.  I am also planning on doing an Internship within the next year or two with an organization known as Jill’s House.


My hope is to continue to grow this blog and help others through my stories.

Thank you so much for following me and commenting on my posts.  You are all so awesome and I am grateful for each and every one of you ❤

May God Bless and watch over YOU always ❤

-Jen ❤

I Let Him Go

 

letting-go

I am no longer a prisoner.

I am free from the toxicity that drenched my soul.

I let him go.

I let him go to free my soul from delusions and chaos that would flood my entire being.

I let him go so that I may finally move on from the guilt and the anger and the confusion.

I let him go so that I may find my true soul. The soul that belonged to me from birth. The soul that was pure and untouched by the lies of this world.

I let him go so that I could be free.

-Jen

May God bless and watch over YOU always ❤

(pic is not mine)

4/20

No, this post is not about blazin up or drugs.  This post is about my first major car accident.

It has been about 3 and a half weeks since the accident.

That accident changed my life.

4/20/2016 10:20 am

I am on my way to Nekter Juice Bar to get some Acai bowls for me and my family.  I decided to bring my sister along for the journey.

10:40am

We reached Nekter and it was so busy that we decided to just pick up breakfast from another place, but first, my sister and I went into a Trader Joe’s that was right next door.  We walked around and bought a couple things before leaving.

10:55am

As we left Trader Joe’s, there was a lot of traffic within the mini shopping center and I remember thinking to myself (after I road raged for a bit), “Jenni, just be grateful you have a car to get around in. You’ll get out of this shopping center soon.”

11:05am

Finally got out of the parking lot and waiting in more traffic to get on the freeway.

11:15am

My spidey senses began to tingle. As I sat in my car conversing with my sister, I felt that something bad was going to happen and sure enough, a millisecond after my feeling I feel a massive impact and hear the worst noise ever.  My head hit against the headrest and as I pressed hard on my break, I felt my car hit the car in front of me.

All I remember is hearing my sister yell, “OH SH*T” and the crunching sound of my car.

I sat in my seat in utter shock and began to cry hysterically.  I actually stopped breathing for a moment that felt like hours.

If it wasn’t for my sister, I probably would have passed out completely.

This ended up being a 4 car accident and  a complete nightmare.

My first car, that used to be my grandpa’s car, was totaled and my mental state was stricken with even more anxiety.

I did not go near or into a car for about 3 days, until I had to in order to see family. I was almost about to give that trip up due to my anxiety, but thankfully I was blessed with an amazing girlfriend who helped me through my anxiety and texted me through my first car ride.

I am currently driving again, but not very long distances and have been going to chiropractic therapy three times a week.  I am soon going to be seeing a psychologist to help with my anxiety and depression again.

Although I still get massive anxiety when I step into a car, I have been trying to remind myself about the grace and protection that God can provide.  It has been an uphill struggle since the accident and my depression has worsened a bit since then, but I have to keep reminding myself about the goodness of my Holy Father and pursue a life worth living.

I am not going to lie, there are A LOT of days in which I just lay in bed and sleep because it feel as if my whole body in under 1000 pounds. Some days I get more irritable quicker and since the accident I have hurt some of the people I love. It’s hard. It’s a challenge. But at the end of the day I have to stare at myself in the mirror and wonder about my purpose that I have on this earth and to stay strong in order to find out my purpose for living and surviving as long as I have.

Anyways, may God bless and watch over YOU always ❤ I love you all

-Jen ❤